Healing After Narcissistic Abuse: My Story

What I have come to understand is that life is a series of lessons, some more difficult to navigate than others. Sometimes it takes a few rounds to understand what we’re supposed to be learning. With the passage of time and the courage it takes to examine our choices in life, we are more likely to discover what it is we are meant to learn.

What I feel is important is that once we have finally gotten a grasp, we use the experience to enlighten those who may benefit in learning from our hard-fought battles.

We may need to learn to let go….let go of relationships, plans for our future, material things….let go of expectations of ourselves and others. The point is that we try our best to heal in a positive way, and that we release the need to gain the approval of others and live our lives in a way that supports our personal growth and happiness. This website and blog are just that. This is a small, yet important, part of my healing process.

I have spent the last couple of years learning about something that I knew nothing about, nor did I think I would ever have to learn about. It was forced upon me, and I partook in the dynamics that enabled it to permeate every fiber of my being, every corner of my life, for decades.

I’m learning to embrace gratitude for being able to rescue myself from the throes of a false reality that had been carefully constructed and reinforced by a man that vowed to love and protect me. I am grateful for all of the health professionals, psychotherapists and medical, that spent hundreds of hours leading me through my healing. Without them I would be lost. I am grateful for the family and friends that have opened their hearts and their homes to me, comforted me, and talked me off a ledge, time and time again. I’m grateful for my children who didn’t have the option of choosing to be raised in a home led by dysfuntional parents and who are, not by choice, a part of this unfortunate journey. They have been of utmost importance to me in my life and in my time of need. I pray that they know the love and appreciation that I have for them and how hard I fought for their well-being, even when I didn’t know I should also be fighting for my own. This doesn’t mean that I don’t get stuck in anger and regret from time to time. Grief and healing are processes that are not linear. I’m moving through the various stages much easier now.

I’ve also learned that forgiving someone for conciously inflicting injury on me isn’t necessary for my own personal healing. In fact, much like judgement, forgiveness is something that only God has the power to do. My faith leads me to believe that my abuser will inevitably be forgiven, just not by me. My job is to learn my lessons, help others, and to be the loving person that I was created to be.

Welcome to my blog, My Story! My goal is to post weekly and to share my insights, my lessons learned, the education and resources I’ve relied on, and to support those who have gone, or are going through similar situations.

Stay tuned………..